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Sawdust Trail

from Disappearances by Matthew Connor

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lyrics

He was gone before the dust had even settled
He was gone before the paint was even dry
He was gone before the crib had been assembled
Some men just don’t know how to say goodbye
And I wonder if I inherited his stature
You know Mama was so short and frail
And I wonder if he found what he was after
When he left us for the sawdust trail

There’s a frame on the wall without a photo
There’s a silence at the center of the town
There were stray dogs dancing in the meadow
On the day they finally tore the foundry down
I was happy to abandon all that history
To see it swallowed by the swale
No, there wasn’t anybody left to miss me
When I set out on the sawdust trail

On my way from Walhalla to Bear Wallow
I saw a man who glistened just like a mirage
He waded out into the water and I followed
The bracken and the brush our camouflage
And he led me by the hand and the sinews
And his hair hung in his eyes like a veil
And we found a rented room to sink into
Such stunning views along the sawdust trail

He was gone before the dusty light of morning
He was gone before the sweat had lost its sheen
He was gone before the memories finished forming
I’ve forgotten if his eyes were grey or green
So I headed north and I stopped at Sunset Diner
As the drizzle on the windshield turned to hail
Thought I recognized the man behind the counter
The mind plays tricks along the sawdust trail

Now I got a chain of ghosts I drag behind me
And nobody here knows my name
Well, I fell into a job down in the valley
Oh, that always seems to be the way
But you gotta put the work in while you’re able
You gotta bring the hammer to the nail
“Sorry” don’t put food on the table
And we’re all starving on the sawdust trail

credits

from Disappearances, released October 21, 2022

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Matthew Connor Boston, Massachusetts

Matthew Connor is a crooner for the 21st century, writing heart-wrenching songs that combine the windswept ideals of classic American balladry with stark depictions of modern-day alienation. The Boston-based Connor has a haunting voice that conjures ghosts of past heartbreaks, and he pairs it with spectral guitars that recall country tearjerkers and alt-pop brooding.

—Maura Johnston ... more

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